Sunflower Alley (The Merriams Book 4) Read online

  His strong, masculine body suddenly seemed too big for her office. The room had never felt so small before. “What’s the other reason?”

  He leaned forward, his strong hands resting on his knees, almost as if he had to grip them to keep from reaching for her. Their gazes locked. “You’re one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever met, and I haven’t been able to keep you out of my head. You must have guessed that from my texts. What you might not know is how unusual that is for me.”

  Goosebumps raised over her arms, and she was glad she was wearing a sweater so he couldn’t see how much he affected her. Maybe it was time to negotiate again. “Not good enough. I want more information about you.”

  He gripped his knees and then settled back in his chair as if he had all the time in the world. “I’ve had a week to think about you and other factors, and I’ve decided. Now it’s your turn to decide if we’re going to have something personal in addition to our business interactions.”

  “You want me to decide right now? You’re pushy.”

  He chuckled. “So are you. I figure that’s one of the reasons why we’re both intrigued and attracted to each other. Other than broken people, how many people actually challenge you?”

  A fair point. He was one of the most compelling men she’d ever met, whether half-freezing in the park or sitting like a caged lion in her office. “Fine, you want me to decide. You may not have promised me your personal story, but I did give you mine. Give me something to work with here. You told me you feel responsible for someone dying. What happened?”

  He looked off, his jaw ticking, and she sat there quietly, wondering if he was going to answer her or walk out. Then he turned back and looked her straight in the eye, his intense stare arresting her breath. “I was the business manager for a project when a natural disaster occurred. He wasn’t the only one who died. People tell me it wasn’t my fault, but inside I feel differently. He was my best friend. I should have protected him better. All of them better.”

  Those words sounded like they were clawing their way out from a broken place inside of him. Her own heart hurt hearing them. “They’re right, you know,” she said softly. “It’s not your fault. I learned that with my mom, but it took a long time.”

  A breath escaped him, and she knew he didn’t believe her. She’d seen it a million times—survivor’s guilt carried a heavy toll. It could take years for a person to move on.

  “I don’t make excuses,” he said, holding up his hand. “I made some…careless decisions in response to what happened. That’s ultimately why I got fired, and why I’m here in Chicago. Right now, that’s all I can tell you. I can’t give you personal or professional references or refer you to my LinkedIn page. But what I can tell you is that I encounter people all the time—I’ve dated them, recruited them, trained them, negotiated with them, led them—and you’re the first person who’s both captivated my primal side and impressed the hell out of me. That’s why I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I wouldn’t text a business associate like that, and I certainly wouldn’t buy them personal gifts.”

  Her belly tightened at the way primal rolled off his tongue, and despite the fact that she’d won numerous community awards, the praise of this somewhat anonymous man meant something. “I don’t quite know what to say, Connor.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Sure you do. You’re too self-aware not to. Would it be less complicated if we didn’t go out? Certainly, but I still find myself asking. I want to sweep you out of this office right now and have you all to myself.”

  Her breath stopped in her chest. No one had ever been this direct with her. And the way he’d said it, holding eye contact the whole time… “Keep going.”

  His brief laugh had her smiling. “I can’t offer you forever if that’s what you’re looking for. I’m not sure anyone would want that with me anyway. I’m too aggressive, and I work too hard, and I have what some see as a million faults.”

  His self-loathing made her want to cross the short distance between them and give him a hug. “A million? I doubt that, Connor.”

  He rubbed his beard. “We’ll see what you think when you’ve had time to tally them. For now, that’s all I can tell you. Louisa, I would like to spend time with you outside the shelter while I’m here. If you don’t want to, just say so. I’ll still want to help you turn this neighborhood around. You’ll never hear or feel anything else from me except professional courtesy. No more texting. Gifts. Nothing. I give you my word.”

  And she already knew she could trust his word. “I appreciate that. And your directness. In fact, it’s refreshing. Most of the men I’ve dated like playing games. Either that, or they run the other way when they realize I’m married to my job.”

  He gestured to her. “I don’t play games unless I have to. As for you being married to your job, I get that. I personally don’t see anything wrong with it. Why is settling down, getting married and having kids, and working a regular forty-hour week the gold standard of happiness?”

  “Amen,” she said.

  “Glad you agree. Personally, I want to do big things with my life, not live in Pleasantville. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Don’t get me wrong. I know a few people who are quite happy with that kind of life. It’s just not for me.”

  Had she ever had this much in common with a man in terms of personal philosophy? No. Her skin was tingling, she realized. She was totally going to go out with him. She thought back to her talk with Boxer. She could no more pass up what Connor was offering personally than she could reject the incredible proposal he’d brought her. “If I catch a whiff of anything in your background I don’t like, we’re done. Personally and professionally.”

  His smile started slow, like the fuse on a stick of dynamite, and then the fire connected, and she felt the full force of his emotion—pride, achievement, and primal desire.

  She couldn’t wait to kiss that smile, because she was honest enough with herself to admit she wanted that. And possibly a lot more.

  “I knew it wouldn’t take long for you to decide,” he said, his eyes locked on hers. “You’re a spur-of-the-moment kind of person.”

  “I kinda am.”

  He stood, walked to the doorway, and leaned against it in an ever-so-sexy way. “Now, show me around. I’d like to especially focus on the kitchen, since you’re already training people for food service careers, and your special reading program for children. You’ll see I’m suggesting you spin off the childcare program, expand it, and establish it as an official daycare and after-school care program open to the public, not just the homeless, with a fee per child about thirty percent under the Chicago average for daycare. Not for your homeless clients, obviously. I did some research, and I couldn’t believe how much the typical program costs.”

  “It’s incredible, isn’t it? Then again, that’s your child.”

  He nodded. “Exactly. Your literacy program is innovative and well recognized. I imagine there are other areas you could emphasize in an expansion, like math and science. I noticed the director of your current daycare program for the homeless has won numerous teaching awards.”

  “Greta,” she said, her heart picking up speed at the thought. “Yes, she’s fantastic.”

  “Your father is also a respected educator and coach. I imagine he could make some suggestions for sports and exercise programs and also has good contacts in the teaching community.”

  She’d never considered leveraging her father’s knowledge that way, but it made sense. No, more than that, she knew he’d welcome a chance to be more involved. “He’d love that.”

  “Your focus on literacy is just the tip of the iceberg,” he said, a slow smile on his face. “You can tell me what you think about the rest of my ideas in the business plan when I pick you up tonight.”

  She laughed and stood up as well. She couldn’t wait to show him what they’d done so far on limited resources. He needed to see that what Sunflower Alley did went beyond business—people’s liv
es were involved. “I love those ideas, but you are bossy. Luckily so am I.”

  “We’ll have to see if I like you bossing me around…” he said in a heated tone as she came around her desk. “I figure we’re a good match. You don’t pander to me.”

  “I don’t pander to anyone,” she said, meeting his hot gaze. “In fact, I’m only giving you a tour now because it’s convenient for me. And to further ground your ideas in reality. Got it?”

  He extended his hand toward the hallway almost in deference. “Yes, Ms. Evans. Lead on.”

  She passed by him, and with only a few inches between them, his body heat made her want to shiver. He did run warm, or maybe he’d been affected by their conversation too. “Eight o’clock is when things calm down around here. I can go out with you then. Now, time for the tour.”

  He smiled again as he took a step closer, inches away from her body now. His nostrils flared as if he’d inhaled her scent, and her belly gripped again in desire.

  “I have a feeling both of us are going to remember how this moment changed things,” he murmured.

  “Me too,” she replied in all honesty. Searching his face, she found herself learning his features: the intense gaze of his beautiful two-color eyes, the dark brows, and the downright sexy square jaw. But something else struck her. Although he’d kept so much of himself from her, his eyes hid nothing—when she looked in them, she could see the weight he carried as well as the desire he had for her. She wanted to touch his face, to trace the line of his cheek, but this wasn’t the time or place. Still, her heart told her he was right about the importance of this moment. Because in it she’d made a promise to herself: he might be helping her turn the neighborhood around and start her training program, but she was determined to help him too. Whatever had happened to cause the deaths of his friend and those other people wasn’t his fault, and she was going to help him heal.

  She only hoped he’d let her.

  Chapter 5

  The most amazing woman he’d ever met had agreed to go out with him.

  Somehow Louisa’s response felt like the greatest victory in what was a string of defeats. This moment was another turning point, he sensed, much like the night he’d met her. He put his hand briefly on the small of her back as she walked down the hall, not only because he simply had to touch her, but also to tell her how much her response meant to him.

  He was going to treat her well for as long as they were together.

  Some of his other siblings, especially his sister Caitlyn, believed in love at first sight. Connor had always scoffed at the idea. However, after a week of nonstop fixation on Louisa, he had to acknowledge the power of instant attraction and understanding. That was a more apt description of their connection. He was glad she was so grounded. Neither of them could get hurt that way.

  As she took him through the front, she explained that clients were restricted from wandering around the shelter for safety and practical reasons. He dropped his hand at the doorway to the kitchen, and she turned to him and put her hand on his chest.

  “The people you’re about to meet mean the world to me. They’re family. They also feed about eighty people three times a day.”

  Did she think he’d disrespect them? “You can trust me, Louisa. I respect hard work and service.” If his parents hadn’t raised them that way, he’d have come to it himself, traveling to the various Merriam job sites, meeting everyone from factory workers in Oklahoma to oil drillers in…

  Corey’s engineering crew in Indonesia came to mind, and he had to box that thought back down again.

  “Great. Just saying.” Something flashed through her eyes—relief, maybe, and pride—and then she was moving into the kitchen quickly. “Hey everybody! I have someone I want you to meet.”

  The punch in her voice was the kind he’d heard in motivational business speakers, the kind that got an audience up on their feet, clapping and cheering after a long day of meetings and workshops. She was pure brilliance in action, and he couldn’t wait to have all that brilliance turned on him when they were alone.

  He walked into the large industrial kitchen, surprised to see it opened into the empty dining room. There were two sliding aluminum panels he imagined could be closed. He wondered if they served guests through it cafeteria-style or if people were served at their tables. Apparently a potato dish and salad were on the menu today. Peeled potatoes were mounded on one table while another held large trays covered in salad greens.

  He made sure to make eye contact with the four people Louisa was greeting with hugs and arm pats. The faces were ones he recognized from the website.

  “This is Connor,” she said, gesturing to him, “and he’s going to help me create the best formal training program ever. He’s blown in from the land of Oz to deliver yellow bricks for all the roads we want to build with this community and the people we serve. I know you’ll make him feel welcome.”

  “Good thing I left my monkeys at home,” he said, following her lead. “Great to meet everyone.”

  The giant black man at the stove came forward, cleaning his hands on his white apron before extending one for Connor to shake. “Us too, man. Boxer said Louisa had someone giving her a business proposal today. I’m Carter, the head chef around here. It’s good to have another helper around. We have lots of people who’d like jobs.”

  Louisa put her arm around the man’s waist as he returned to his workstation. “Carter was one of the first people who embraced my early vision of a training program.”

  Connor nodded. “I read your story on the website. Very impressive.” The man had gone from being homeless to working in the kitchen of Louisa’s half-brother, the award-winning chef at Soledad. He’d managed to get the money and references to attend culinary school. Instead of getting a job at a top restaurant, though, he’d come back to the shelter. Somehow Connor knew it was because of Louisa. “Man, I thought Boxer was big. Just how tall are you, Carter? Even at six three, you tower over me.”

  “Six eight,” the man said with a laugh. “I figure it’s a good thing. Keeps what hair I have left safe with all the time I put in on that temperamental stove.”

  Since Carter was mostly bald, Connor couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m terrible in the kitchen, but I hadn’t thought about setting myself on fire before.”

  Louisa grinned and smacked one of the others on the back. “Spicy here has a young Eminem fanboy thing going on with that pretty dyed blond hair of his, but he’s magic with salad and desserts. He was on the streets young like I was, but he made it out.”

  “Because someone stopped me on the street one day and asked if I was feeling okay,” Spicy said. “I had the flu. Louisa brought me here, put me to bed, and brought me soup. She kinda won me over.”

  “She has that way about her, doesn’t she?” Connor said, shaking his hand. “Good to meet you.”

  “And this is Jewel,” Louisa said, bringing over a large black woman in her fifties. “She’s just like her name.”

  “She’s always said that,” Jewel said, hugging Louisa tightly before extending her hand to him. “I’ve been around here as long as Carter. The good Lord blessed me when I met Louisa on the streets during a snowstorm.”

  He glanced over at Louisa and they shared a long look. “The weather wouldn’t stop her. I know that much.”

  “Nothing does, and thank God,” Jewel said, turning to the remaining woman yet to be introduced. “Come on, girl. He looks tough but he won’t bite.”

  Her comment about him made him wonder. Had he changed so much that she didn’t see the wolf others used to see so clearly?

  “Connor, this here is Maria,” Jewel continued. “She’ll make you the finest tamales and beans ever. Here at Sunflower Alley, we don’t just feed people’s bodies. We do our best to feed their souls too.”

  “We do at that,” Louisa said, beaming, “although I can’t cook. Hence why I needed help.”

  “I still think Jewel’s cornbread is better than my tamales,” Maria said wi
th a shy smile, crossing her arms at her waist. “It’s good to meet you, Connor.”

  He didn’t step forward to extend his hand to her. She might not trust him or like to be touched, he imagined, but there was a vein of courage behind that shy smile. “Maria, it’s an honor to meet you.”

  “An honor?” a dry, male voice asked. “Maria, have you been sharing your tamales with someone other than me?”

  Connor turned to see Louisa launch herself into the arms of a young man who shared her smile. He recognized him as her half-brother, Damien Evans—chef of Soledad and, from what Connor had read online, one of Chicago’s most eligible bachelors.

  “What are you doing here?” Louisa asked. “It’s almost lunch.”

  He waved a hand. “I have minions to handle prep. Lunch doesn’t get going until twelve thirty anyway. Right, Carter?”

  “Hey, man,” the giant man said, coming over and giving Damien a bear hug that lifted him up off the ground. “You gearing up for the shelter’s next cooking competition, because I’m going to destroy you.”

  “In your dreams,” Damien said, hugging and kissing Jewel and Maria on the cheeks before fist-bumping Spicy. “You’ll be crying for days after I beat you this time.”

  “Connor, you probably saw this on the website,” Louisa said, “but the shelter brings in local chefs to compete against Carter every month. We invite the community to join us and our clients. It’s a grand time.”

  He had seen it and thought it a brilliant way to fundraise and engage the community. “I’m looking forward to the next one.”

  “It’s pure hell for Damien since I kick his ass whenever he’s the visiting chef.” Carter laughed, a deep sound that reverberated throughout the room like a church bell.

  “Laugh all you want,” Damien said with a wink at Maria. “You’re going to be unseated.”

  Louisa came over to stand beside Connor as the chefs continued their bantering. “Damien! Come meet Connor.”